By Marissa Gough
a.k.a. Miss Molotov
As a performer and acrobat who has had an “interesting” sexuality, I have had the chance to watch my sexual evolution in parallel with my physical pursuits as a performer. There are a few things I think that need to be addressed before I divulge all of my most intimate secrets.
First, as a performer my personal life is constantly on display. Mainly because people have a natural curiosity and sometimes sadistic desire to examine the lives of people who they place on a pedestal. I have learned the hard way that people are always watching and would have no problem watching you burn then have a good gossip about it.
Those archetypes and stereotypes about the sensual wild woman, Pocahontas syndrome, daring and exiting acrobat that have made us so successful and easily objectified are all true but in a very 2 dimensional way. The fact is that a fair part of those stereotypes have been with us our entire lives, wild woman and acrobats these days don’t usually just quit our incredibly stable jobs in incredibly normal lives to become dare devils.We where made this way whether we like it or not.
I think I was 10 years old the first time I had a “Pocahontas” moment where I was sexually objectified as an adult woman would be, and living in Montreal as a young teenager who left home early, I was well aware that my sexuality had a worth.
It also changed my perspective of my own sexuality and as we always want what we don’t have in our lives, my value of true intimacy and kindness respect was developed at an early age. All of those being said, now as a performer this has been compounded by my very public persona, the nature of the people and experiences I choose are never superficial and always ones I can learn and grow from.
Now on a purely physical level, having a body that is strong, flexible, balanced and aligned certainly helps on every level, but also having worked through all those hidden barriers to a healthy sexuality certainly makes my adventures positive and satisfying. In fact having strong neurological connections and sensory perception does in fact make touching and being touched far more intense.
As most would stereotype an acrobat as being capable of more adventurous sexual positions, the fact that as a woman even with strong pelvic and vaginal muscles, a certain amount of relaxation is necessary to achieve multiple orgasms. The most interesting thing I have found as an acrobat has been that when you have a partner who you train with, it makes the connection you share in and out of your intimate lives that much more intense.This being because of the awareness developed between bodies which is so necessary for those incredible tricks to be pulled off consistently. Not to mention the hours of time being spent communicating about how to make the tempo between two separate bodies function as one. On a cerebral level as well,knowing that your partner is sharing this experience with you enforces this connection on every level.