Contact Sphere Sexual Stats

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June 29, 2014 by synapticwolf

I’ve blogged mildly scientific reports about the sexual preferences of those who indulge in rope dart, contact staff, traditional staff and dragon staff. Now it’s time to leave the staff play behind us and move onto the balls.

Contact Sphere

Hooray for balls!

The term contact juggling now has too many meanings to exclusively refer to sphere play.

Unfortunately, this is what comes up on a google image search for “contact sphere.”

Let me start off by saying, that I fully expected contact (sphere) jugglers to be a twisted bunch. Partly because most of them were inspired at a young age by this:

So I expected a David Bowie slant to my survey results. That said, as a true juggling geek, I now find Michael Moschen sexier than David Bowie.

Okay, so it’s still kind of a toss up.

Next survey-impacting factor to note is that contact jugglers tend to be a bit, well, odd. They put in their practice hours more relentlessly than many other jugglers and they use their bodies in weirder ways to support their prop.

I don’t know WHAT Ecsher did with this thing, but I’m sure it qualified as “odd.”

So, without further ado, here is a chart describing the percent-based sexual preferences of the 158 contact jugglers who responded to my survey as weighed against the rest of you freaky spinners.

Contact jugglers are a dominant bunch! They overwhelmingly prefer to be in control during their sexual encounters. (That is, as compared to the control group of non-sphere spinners.) Here I will reference the visceral control necessary to get a contact ball to do what you want it to. With other forms of spinning, we can more easily allow the tool to choose the direction and just follow it there.

Ian Jenson showing his sphere who’s in charge.

Other observations: contact ballers, like contact staffers are, scientifically speaking, less gay than other spinners. (Pause here for a moment of regret that I did not control for gender in the study in order to break this trend down more thoroughly. #notarealscientist)

And, oddly enough (but I already said that contact jugglers were odd. . .), these guys are less exhibitionist than the rest of us attention-whoring performance artists. Practicing a spin art for the show of it can take you pretty far. . .but you’ve got to take contact sphere even farther than that to make it stick. My theory here is that people take up this particular oddity of an art form mostly for themselves.